Monday, 6 August 2012

Lost and found....

I'm the middle child of five, four sisters and one brother.
Yesterday 5th August 2012 at 10:30pm I lost my big SisterM. Not misplaced of course but she lost her two year battle with ovarian cancer.  She had been the most determined fighter I'd ever known. I don't need to go into the details of the various treatments, we all know just how horrid they are, but she rarely complained. So many hospital visits, expensive car parking or even more expensive taxis when she didn't feel well enough to drive. When they stopped the chemo and her hair grew back she had to donate her costly wig and hats to other cancer patients. Calmly researching her possible future needs like a wheelchair and stairlift and accepting each new challenge with such a positive attitude that many said she was an inspiration to others, but we knew she was mainly trying to make this horrid situation easier for her husband, three children, 10 grandchildren, four siblings and our families and everyone else she had contact with. She had been a very respected magistrate for nearly two decades and having to give that up just a few months ago was harder for her than almost anything else.

As my big sister things weren't always plain sailing of course, her diplomatic side meant we all discussed various things but she was only truly happy when we ultimately did it her way! We were possibly the closest siblings out of the five of us, she was the most supportive when I was being rebellious and hubby and I often had holidays with her and her hubby with our children when they were young and just as four adults when our families were independent,  even this year we had our great trip to Florida and our day trip to Hever Castle was just weeks ago.

The end was quite sudden really, she had fought so hard and finally she lost the energy to fight. She was in the hospice, she didn't want to die at home, she had her reasons and organized everything including her funeral preferences. The funeral is the day after tomorrow, Wednesday and the retired Rabbi she specifically asked to conduct the service came to see us today and he was not surprised when we handed him the sealed envelope containing the eulogy SisterM had written herself and none of us have seen....she has to have the last word!

Of course she's not lost at all, you'll find SisterM in our hearts!


Nic said...

Really sorry to hear of your loss. Really lovely to read of your sister still getting the last word. Will be thinking of you all xxx

MumB / @mumbosh said...

Thanks Nick xxx

MumB / @mumbosh said...

Sorry Nic silly auto-correct decided you needed the "k" not me.